January 2023 Blog/Vlog – Reflective look at my art, studio, paintings, sketchbooks

So we are coming to the end of January 2023 already. I feel like time just seems to get faster and faster as I get older LOL – I am 50 next week. That’s a hard milestone to compute in my little brain – am I really going to be half of 100??? Oh dear! It really does kind of make you reflect on your life. Anyway, I am sharing a vlog of me talking about and sharing a tour of some of my paintings, sketchbooks and my messy art room/studio. How is your January going? Are you setting yourself new goals and how do you see yourself in another year? Me, well I think I’m just going with the flow, concentrating on my health and feeling better and just enjoying doing art. I pray for only the best of life and God’s blessings in your lives, and in mine and my family’s too. I’m expecting good things for 2023.

My shop on Redbubble – https://www.redbubble.com/people/LauraCrean/explore?fbclid=IwAR3cYri5MDLJ_TTq7F-Kh1rf7yWdaHi_p2hKQo5UX0ZjYJ_WC35kLkBXGnE&page=1&sortOrder=recent

Fairy Tree by Moonlight

A while back I painted some silhouette trees and one was on a fair sized canvas in the moonlight. It came out very pretty, I thought, but as I have been looking at it on my wall for quite a few weeks I realised it looked unfinished. Like it had more of a story bursting to come out of it. Please click the video and watch it on You Tube to join my fairy adventure, and please don’t forget to like my video, subscribe to my channel and tell me what comes to your mind about the painting as you go in the comments section, any observations or questions welcome…

When you decide to make a quiet book for your grandchild…

I love Pinterest, don’t you? I have been collecting ideas for quiet book pages on there for a long time and now was the time to start digging in, become inspired and sew my little heart out for 2 weeks straight to make a quiet book for my 1 year old granddaughter.

It was going to be for Christmas, but I couldn’t wait that long, I decided to pull out all the stops and get enough pages together to give it to her for her first birthday. I will continue to make pages and give them to her for Christmas and birthdays.

Please come along on my creative journey and perhaps you will be inspired to make something. Be my guest and check out my Pinterest pages for ideas. Let me know in the comments what you think of my first ever attempt at a quiet book and feel free to share your own efforts – sure to be better than mine, but my granddaughter loved it so I am happy.

Pinterest quiet book pages ideas – https://www.pinterest.co.uk/lauracrean5/felt-patterns-finger-puppets-and-quiet-book-ideas/

Using Art as Therapy – Do What Helps You Feel Better…

My advice to the wandering WordPressers who stumble across this page today is – if you are struggling with your mental health like I often am, find something that helps distract your wandering negative thoughts and feelings and do something that helps you feel better about your self. For me that’s art. So here are 3 of my latest videos of me sharing that love of art for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy, and please like the videos on YouTube and subscribe and click the little bell and share the love around, as my videos are following the proverbial tumbleweed into the desert of YouTube land at the moment…

Shallow (the Pentatonix version)- in relation to a dream I had last night of diving into a soggy bread carpet! What????

Oh my goodness guys!! This is just how I am feeling right now. This song is amazing anyway, but this version by Pentatonix… it just cut to the core of how I am feeling at the moment! That Cello with their angelic voices! I love the visuals as well in this video; the black and white, like the world feels to me at the moment, with the gold highlighted. All their jewellery and the snake-head holder umbrella stand or poker holder or whatever that is (on looking back, it is a plant pot holder) but – it’s like it stands out in this video; stark against the black and white! Thinking about it after a while the symbolism feels to me like we feel (and by we I mean me but probably most people can relate) that the world makes us feel so dulled down and dreary! But the gold is highlighted, like the jewellery, what people would think of as the ‘finer things in life’, like the snake holding up the flowers ‘on a pedestal’ in the video. It’s like we crave it because it stands out of the gloom…calling us – we’re like ravens mesmerised by the glitter – but…”not all that glitters is gold” right? God reminds us to look for His treasure “Seek first the Kingdom of God…” And that line – “I’m at the deep end, watch as I dive in, I’m far from the shallow now!”…

…Last night I had a dream about this strange carpet that I bought at a flea market, but when I washed it, it became like soggy bread! Then I was hosting some kind of cooking demonstration party, and this Italian woman was supposed to be demonstrating how to cook something. To me in the dream, it was like a cross between a lasagne and a bread and buttered layer pudding! But instead she stood on the sofa and demonstrated how to dive. She dove off of the sofa and landed in this soft pile of this soggy bread carpet! Oh the symbolism God uses to talk to me! He has such a sense of humour.

I just feel, with how my mental health is at the moment, that this soggy bread stuff is my emotions (represented by the water I should be diving into – but it’s soggy bread) and bread is the word of God, so represents my spiritual feelings and emotions at the moment – like, not even the word of God can give me the comfort and peace I need at the moment because I’m too messed up in my mind to make sense of anything! I know, I’m sorry, a bit deep and depressing for Boxing Day – but it’s how I feel and what’s going on with me! The layers in the lasagne and the layered bread and butter pudding are the complexity and layers of my emotions and what is going on in my life, but it is also the layers of God’s word and God is speaking to me using the symbolism of diving in – usually you dive into water – right? Water represents the emotions, but in my dream, what was being dived into was this ‘soggy bread carpet’ symbol, so yeah, it represents where all my emotions are and I’m wallowing in it, drowning in it, in this deep soggy mess that should be a carpet – the carpet is me being grounded in God’s word; it should be soft, comfortable and comforting, but at the moment that’s not how I am feeling.

God says to me in this dream, you should be diving into my Word, leaning on me for comfort and guidance, but instead you are being drowned in your and by your emotions. I know what God is saying to me in this dream, but it still doesn’t change how I feel. Sometimes life just gets too much for us – even the most grounded of people can find themselves drowning – am I right? Well, so that’s how I am feeling, expressed through this video that I was led to and this conversation with God through my dream last night. There is so much more to this dream but I think it will make this post far more than it needs to be, for example, the Italian woman represents me also, I see the Italian people as very passionate people, and as a passionate person myself I know I can be led far too easily by my emotions. There is a lot of symbolism in this dream for me to unpack and I will do later. God has just shown me this morning that he wants to speak to me, even if I don’t want to or can’t hear him at the moment because my emotional life is drowning me. He has also started speaking to me again through music, he has done this a lot in the past. And because he has given me this gift of unpacking symbolism, this is the way he speaks to me through the music too. So this will be the first of a series of posts on God speaking to me through the music, especially the music of Pentatonix. I’m also very led by obsessions, and when I get my teeth stuck into something, I’m like a dog with a bone – I can’t let it go. So God being God, he meets me where I am and always uses the things in the world that my magpie eye focuses on and turns it around to what He wants to tell me.

Anyway, my messy life aside – enjoy the beautiful video and your Boxing day everyone. I’m off to spend it with my children and their boyfriends at my lovely daughter’s house, where her boyfriend is going to cook up a storm as usual because he’s an amazing cook. So I shall get lost in his food and their company for the day. Love to everyone. Have a great Boxing Day.

The Secret Staircase – How your art can grow…

This is a video of me experimenting with painting a secret garden staircase using a Pinterest picture as my inspiration. I think it just shows how an amateur artist like myself can grow and learn and create a pretty nice painting just by giving it a go, even when you think you may have taken on something too hard for your ability – just cracking on and giving it a go can leave you surprised by what you can actually achieve.

Please support me and my artistic endeavours on YouTube guys – please come over and watch my videos and subscribe to my channel – What do you guys think of my art?

Painting My Grandmother’s Vase – A lesson in not giving up on your art…

I’m so proud of both this video and the artwork. They have both taken weeks to complete but both came out better than I expected, and the art is a tribute to both my mother and her inspiration to do art and grandmother, whose vase it was. It is one of the only things I have to remember her by, so it’s quite special, and now I have a piece of artwork on the wall by the vase as a tribute. Please watch and enjoy the cool music tracks that, I think, accompany the video perfectly. Have a laugh at all my terrible art mistakes, but don’t worry it all turns out great in the end. Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe on YouTube, it helps more people to see the videos because of the way the algorithm works. Oh yes and share the video around – always good to share the love…

Day ONE – Dream to poem

OK, so God just gave me a doozy of a dream and a task – and I was like, really God? really? You going to put that on me? LOL – Anyway the dream is a bit long to go into right now, but the idea is basically some kind of comic strip, using poetry to reach the kids. Then, as I’m sitting in bed scratching my head, he gives me a poem that sounds like it’s meant for ‘Will I am’ LOL – you ready for this?

DAY ONE

In the beginning,

there was a simple plan –

Make a planet!

Make a man!

That doesn’t sound like it’s so hard

But then there came the Satan card!

God made a garden where Man could chill

Where he could play and had free-will

To rule and reign and strut his stuff!

But Satan made that kind of tough.

You see, there was only one little law…

“Don’t touch that tree in the middle y’all”

God said;

“Now, don’t you eat that fruit,

or from the garden you’ll get the boot!”

And Satan, with a gleam in his eye,

he twisted the truth and spun a lie,

He wrapped that Eve in a lovely story,

that took away God’s plan and glory!

He told her;

“Of course it’s good to eat,

Now pick one girl, and take a seat!”

And then she gave one to her man;

Delicious! Now Satan had a fan!

But my, oh my! How shook was God?

Cos on his toes had Satan trod…

“Oh no, you didn’t!”

He told that fake

and turned him into a lowly snake!

He banished man, and he IS still,

but it’s OK, you can chill,

cos God had a plan right from Day one,

he’ll let that Satan have his fun!

But in the end, It’s Man God loves

and his will has always been to walk WITH us!

And one day soon we’ll have our chance,

to be in that garden, free to dance!

I mean, I love it, I think it’s kind of beautiful, because God’s plan IS beautiful, right? But it’s a fun poem that I think speaks to a younger generation and I think it would make kind of a cool rap! What do you think? I have been immersed in music this last week, as I have been home unwell with a bad back, and the last videos I watched last night were of Tom Jones and of course, he is with Will I am on the voice, so maybe that was in my head LOL

When you have Covid and you’re feeling crap…

So my writing has basically dried up again and that usually has something to do with the fact that I am ill in one way or another, because I basically feel like I am a walking medical encyclopaedia, if it isn’t one thing it’s another, physical and mental, certainly for the last couple of years and really my whole life to be honest I am the kind of person that get’s sick, it seems, at the drop of a hat. I was a very sickly child, always off school with colds. I was a very premature baby, a tiny baby, weighing only about 2lbs I believe, when I was born my Mum used to joke that they had a tiny pippet of a bottle and she used to hold me in one hand, bring her thumb round to open my mouth to put the tiny teat in. I mean I don’t know, tiny baby? Don’t know what happened there, I’m more of an elephant these days! I certainly was in the special care baby unit for a long time, I don’t know whether that effected me with bonding issues, but anyway that’s for another day.

I have a memory of being about 5 or 6 and being in the school first aid room, they had a Russian doll in there which I just loved to play with, so maybe that’s why I was there? But I do remember my Mum picking me up and being a bit cross that she had to come and get me again! I mean, I don’t know, I remember I was feeling sick, so didn’t know what I was supposed to do about that? The next time I remember her really being cross, is when she came and picked me up from school aged about 14 because I thought I was having a heart attack! It was a very stressful situation, I was trying to make people believe I was psychic and could read their lines on their hands and had dug myself into a hole and now realised I looked even more stupid than usual. So, thinking back on that one now, I wonder whether it was actually a panic attack! I had also had to stay home during the exams that year because I had some kind of flu – nothing unusual for me! So when most people get a cold, or get a bit sick, it’s just that, but I feel like I must be like a man who has man flu, because everything I get seems to affect me 100 times worse, even my periods have caused me a ridiculous amount of problems this last ten years. My sister used to say I was a hypochondriac, but I used to say, doesn’t that mean I’m pretending to be sick? But I am sick so I can’t be one of those can I?

So, I’ve been working as a Care Worker for the past 5 years, It’s the longest time I have ever been in one job for an employer, so I must be good at it at least. I love all my clients, but for the last couple of years I have had a lot of sickness, with one thing and another, a lot of which really leaves me scratching my head as to what on Earth is going on with me! Anyway, so I haven’t been long off work with a terrible inner ear infection, which gave me a bout of horrible vertigo symptoms, and my 16 year old daughter who is doing her college education at home because of lockdown, had to come and walk me home from my job because I couldn’t walk and then I was off for I don’t know how long now, I’ve lost the plot – a week maybe and then I had a text from the NHS saying I had tested postitve for Covid (we do weekly tests as carers). I was actually stunned when I got the text, because I felt well. I thought, maybe it’s a mistake, or I just won’t have symptoms, which I thought, for me would be strange, as I said, usually I get everything ten times worse than everyone. So I let work know I had to self-isolate, and thought, they are not going to be happy as I have only just come back. Then what do you know, the very next day, last Wednesday, the 3rd of February 2021, a week ago today, 2 days before my 48th birthday, I start feeling the symptoms.

Of course, I needn’t have doubted, I’ve had a terrible week. I have basically spent much of it sleeping on and off – fever-filled – fitful kind of sleep, where your body just hurts but you can’t really describe why it hurts or where it hurts, you just hurt, aching all over, drenched in sweat, head aches, feeling sick, not being able to taste my food, runny nose, cough etc. basically feeling horrible. I am still feeling absolutely horrid – so what’s new? Seems to be the story of my life the last couple of years, and Covid is only part of it, but anyway…So today I have Diarrhoea, I know that’s pleasant isn’t it – thought this would lighten the mood – so I’m chatting to my daughter on the phone telling her how crap I feel and low and behold I coughed and shat myself! And I told her how it was, I was like, you know what I just shat myself so I think I better go and clean myself up! And we both laughed about it. I mean if you can’t laugh under such disgusting circumstances there’s no hope for humanity is there? The only other positive today was the guy on the other end of the 111 call I made, he sounded absolutely lovely, could have listened to him all day…daydream over, sleeping for England at the moment so not really sure when I’m dreaming and when I’m awake. Need the loo – Oh! Must be awake then! I know, I know, I’ve got crap coming out of me every which way.

Who needs ‘Randonautica’ when you have God guiding your path?

Join me on an adventure to find ‘peace’ – in this video, I explore the new craze of Randonauting. I didn’t download the app but please watch my adventure anyway as I did find some interesting coincidences that I stumbled across on my little adventure. or skip to the last 13 minutes of the video to hear my thoughts on Randonautica and some of the experiences people have had with it. I also include a few bible verses, so if it is your thing you can grab a bible as you follow along. Otherwise, just grab a cup of tea and be my companion on my journey. Here are the links to the videos I had watched that led me to have an adventure and explore where God took me…

positive Randonauting videos:-

Finding Happiness Randonautica experience – they found God and a puppy! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF36V…

Positive manifesting of fairies and butterflies – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Fl9S…

Follow the white rabbit… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhxX5…

Manifesting happy/positive experiences – (law of attraction!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-Tq6…

The happy girl and lots of PURPLE FLOWERS and Owls! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6e0i8…

Fairy Princess adventure with a purple dragon!!! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3KvJ…

guy taken to a well! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z8Xsr…

A sermon I had been watching during the time I was also led to the Randonauting videos (reminded about “A little bird told me”) – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpfMT…

To buy my fantasy adventure novel “The Realm of the Purple Dragon” – https://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Realm-Of…

To buy my artwork “Oh God my Rock” that you may have spotted hidden in the middle of the video – https://www.redbubble.com/i/photograp…

More artwork on different products (i.e. Merch) – https://www.redbubble.com/people/Laur…

My blog – https://lauracrean.wordpress.com/

The Well in the Garden on Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/welinthegard…

The Realm of the Purple Dragon on Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/The-Realm-of…

Laura’s Arts and Crafts on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/Laurasartsan…

Laura Crean – Poet on Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/Laura-Crean-…

My Twitter – https://twitter.com/Saucergirl

A ‘Time’ Miracle and possible Angelic Visitation

This is where I tell you about a strange encounter I had this week with God, a possible angelic visitation, and a miracle involving ‘time’. Yes, I do ramble, but it’s worth it I promise – there’s a message here and it may be for you!

An excerpt from “Dawn’s Greeting” by Laura Crean

An excerpt from Dawn’s Greeting – Sharra’s monologue to Kelly about the gifts of the Spirit…

Note – This book, this science-fiction, fantasy novel is a little bit of a thought experiment on what Christians could look like in the far off distant future, if they are still here. I’m talking hundreds of thousands of years. For a little context to the story, Sharra and Kelly are, what I call in the book, Dawn Children. Kelly is born in our time but has been born with a special gift and is “harvested” by the Dawn Children, taken out of her time into the future to be trained as a Dawn Child because of her gift.

Kelly asks Sharra, “What is my purpose? What does God want from me? And Sharra tells her:

“What he wants for all his children; that you live your life and live it to the full, using the gifts that he has given you for the good of all, in peace, in unity, as one body, one family in him, loving each other as we love ourselves. When one suffers, all suffer! If humanity doesn’t learn this lesson it will never thrive. It will continue to get sick and this sickness affects not just humanity but the planet, the ecosystem – it will die – humanity will die!

“God loved each of us enough to become one of us and share in our suffering as a man, and not only share it, but bare it all for us as Christ on the cross, because he knew that we couldn’t get through it alone – so he bore it for us so that through him we would become more than our individual suffering. We could feed on him! Draw on his strength! He is our cure! He gives us his strength each day, to live as one body. We use the link we have with him and through him to support each other – together we are stronger.

“Your gifts are what make you unique. We each have different gifts, each as a member of his body – a hand, a foot, a mouth, a heart etc. One of your gifts is, it seems, the ability to live in the moment – it is a way to observe. To be still and see the whole picture – what is coming in that moment (that others may not notice), and how to use all you see in that moment. The flow of time is just an illusion really; it is just made up of an infinite now!! But we live too fast to see the whole picture. You have the ability to step into eternity and just be, and that is a rare gift. I believe God wants you to see things from his perspective for just a moment – see it all a little clearer, so that you can step in and use that insight – that vision – to do something wonderful. He will only give you the knowledge so that you can use it for the good of all – so use it wisely!”

Thanks everyone. Please don’t forget to like and share with your friends. Having encouragement will give me the drive to continue writing and eventually publish.

God bless you all

❤ Laura ❤

Sharing a sample of my work in process – genre fantasy/Sci-Fi…

CHAPTER FIVE

“Break up your unploughed ground

and do not sow among thorns…”

Jeremiah 4:3

“But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil…”

Matthew 13:23

Ronald got up from his daughter’s bedside and wandered over to the window of the private isolation room his daughter had been occupying for the past 2 days. He gazed out at the stars and prayed to God to send a doctor that could help his little girl. Angela had fallen asleep with her head in her hands, on the bed by Kelly’s hand clutching her bible and rosary, so that she would feel even the slightest movement when her daughter awoke from her coma. The room was deathly quiet.

A doctor came into the room a little after midnight. Ronald turned to see who had entered and noted that she looked very young. Surely, he thought, she couldn’t even be in her twenties! Barely any older than his own child asleep on the bed he stood by. He assumed she was a student.

“Good evening. It’s a bit late for student doctors isn’t it?” He quizzed her. The young woman seemed amusingly distracted by his question. “What makes you think I am a student Mr Kemp?” Ronald shrugged. “Well I, I don’t know.” He stammered, “You just look, well, you just look too young to be a qualified doctor.”

The young woman smiled and even though she was wearing a surgical mask, her whole face lit up with the smile and It was infectious. He couldn’t help but return a smile, even if it was the last thing he wanted to do at that moment. She was so beautiful. Almost angelic, he mused. He considered to himself that she should be a model and not a doctor. “Well I am flattered, but I can assure you Mr Kemp that I am more than qualified to care for your daughter.” And he had no doubts at all that she was.

The young looking doctor walked across the room and lifted Kelly’s notes from their position at the end of her bed. Glancing through them briefly and then checking her hand held monitor. She tutted, and then looking at her watch, added some notes of her own to both the paper record and the electronic one. Then she took Kelly’s pulse, temperature and blood pressure, adding these results to the notes also and then nodded to herself. Ronald watched all of this with quiet interest and then said gently, “I’m sorry doctor but I don’t think we’ve been introduced yet. We normally have a Doctor Price.”

The young doctor put down Kelly’s notes and raised her gloved hand up for Ronald to shake it, “Oh I do apologise, sorry! Where are my manners? Doctor Sharra Dawn. I’m here to assess Kelly for her transfer.” Ronald shook his head in ignorance and confusion, “Transfer? What transfer? We haven’t been told anything about a transfer!”

Sharra smiled again, almost melting Ronald’s heart. She must be an angel surely! He laughed to himself as her charm seemed to hold him in a captivated trance. Sharra cleared her throat, “Well, it really is the best thing for her at the moment, in her present condition. It is best if she is placed in absolute isolation in the coma hospital.” Again Ronald shook his head in ignorance, “Coma hospital? What coma hospital?”

Of course until they had changed history, there had indeed been no such thing as this coma hospital, and his mind glitched a little as it received the updated time-line and he suddenly remembered that there was actually such a place. “Oh the coma hospital! Of course, I remember it now. How strange that I had forgotten it existed.” Sharra nodded and motioned for Kelly’s father to sit down, looking fleetingly at the corridor and at the sleeping Mrs Kemp and then shut the door.

She glanced casually over at Kelly laying motionless in her hospital bed. “I’ll be truthful with you Mr Kemp. Kelly’s condition is serious. Life threatening in fact. I am an expert in my field and I know that once a patient enters a state like this…” and she indicated Kelly with a nod of her head, “…they rarely come out of it over night, or even within a year!” Ronald slumped into his chair. His face fell into his hands as he wept. Sharra felt absolutely awful lying to him like this, but what else could she do? She had to make it look convincing.

“I have a…well, let’s call it a retreat, rather than an institution. It is a place where all such cases I encounter can be placed, cared for, monitored and studied to find out what it is that makes them go into such a…” She searched for the right word, “…hibernating state. It is essential to the patient’s…Kelly’s recovery, that you allow the professionals to take over completely until she comes out of her coma. We have found this is the best way for all the patients and families concerned and leads to the most favourable outcomes.”

She stopped for a second as she noticed the horror in Kelly’s father’s eyes at the thought of not being able to see his daughter. She came over and sat next to him, putting a hand of comfort on his hands now laying limp in his lap. “We send all of our families weekly reports, videos etc. and the minute she comes out of her coma or shows signs of waking up, I can assure you that you will be sent for immediately.” Ronald looked absolutely horrified. “You mean we can’t visit her at all?”

Sharra gently took his hand, “Well, not too often anyway. We will give you a visiting schedule. It really is the best thing for Kelly right now…and your family.”

He nodded mutely, not really sure what to make of the whole thing, but he didn’t question her authority. “Best if you and your wife go home now Mr Kemp and leave the worrying to my team and myself. You can see her into the ambulance if you like and then when she is settled into her new room you can come for a short visit.” Kelly’s father nodded once more and replied quietly, “Can I have a few moments to discuss this with my wife please?” Sharra nodded and moved her comforting hand to his arm, “Of course. Let me know when you are ready and I will call my team to get her into the ambulance.” Again he nodded and Sharra left the room so he could wake his wife and tell her the bad news.

During Kelly’s first day and night in the local hospital, Sharra and Darrow had managed to shift time enough so that they could falsify papers and documents and be accepted into the medical community. They had gone back 20 years and spent it preparing the ground for the moment in time when Kelly could safely and legally be placed in Sharra’s hospital, with her parents’ permission. Then they would be in control of Kelly’s hibernating body.

Dawn Children do not age in the same way as regular people and so the Dawn cousins hadn’t in fact wasted any of their own time playing this cosmic trick on the continuum. Unfortunately they had caused a few minor paradoxes as they changed Earth’s medical history, but it was a small price to pay to get Kelly away from the Earth before she made a few of her own, possibly major changes to the Earth’s history, causing a catastrophic unchangeable paradox, which could end the universe as they knew it.

Sharra stood in the corridor and tapped her foot impatiently. They had spent a lot of time and effort preparing for this moment and she hoped it wasn’t in vain. She hated to think they would end up kidnapping her after all. She hadn’t lied to Ron Kemp when she had said she was an expert in her field and had an institution for coma patients; she had in the last twenty years on Earth established herself as an expert in her field and was most respected in the medical community, as was Darrow as a solicitor. It had to look as natural as possible when Kelly literally disappeared off of the face of the Earth.

Doctor Price strolled up to Sharra, smiled and nodded, “Sharra.” He said in simple greeting. He was a tall man, well over six feet and was a handsome middle-aged gentleman, clean shaven and smartly dressed under his white coat. “It’s always a pleasure to see you. Shame it has to be under such depressing circumstances.” He looked her up and down and laughed pleasantly. “Why is it that you never seem to age?” She shuffled uncomfortably. “You are as beautiful now as the first time I saw you, what, it’s got to be at least fifteen years?” She nodded and blushed authentically. “Steven you flatter me as usual.” She really did like this man. Even if he was physically old enough to be her father. She was, with all her time travelling adventures, in effect old enough to be his great, great, great grandmother. Steven returned to his professional tone for a moment, “And how is our patient this evening Doctor? Any change?”

“No change I’m afraid. I was just preparing Mr Kemp for the fact that I will be transferring his daughter to my own unit.” Steven Price shook his head sadly and followed her gaze into the darkened room towards the couple holding each other in a tight embrace. Steven had seen this scene all too many times before but Sharra had always been there personally to ease the families’ burdens. “It is a most unusual case though Doctor. Have you ever seen anything like it before?” Sharra coughed and pretended to clear her throat. She hated lying. It wasn’t in a Dawn Child’s nature. “Only a few Doctor, and all scattered across the Earth, but I’m sure that once she is under mine and my team’s care in the coma unit she will make a steady recovery.”

Steven smiled once more and gently touched Sharra’s arm in an affectionate and rarely personal gesture. “Of that I have no doubt Sharra.” He reverted to the informal use of her name. She flushed. And then just as he seemed to be about to enter the room to speak to Kelly’s parents, he appeared to change his mind and turned back to speak to her. Sharra’s heart almost skipped a beat. “Eh, Sharra, would you care to join me for a coffee or a late meal before you go back to your clinic?” She tried not to breathe a sigh of relief and felt hugely flattered. She thought back to the Doctor Price she had met over ten years previously. A younger, very dedicated workaholic. He had obviously started to review his priorities. About time he started looking for someone to settle down with, she thought. It couldn’t be her unfortunately, as she wasn’t going to be here for many more months. Shame, she thought sentimentally as she imagined herself briefly as his wife with children running around her. She snapped out of her momentary daydream and searched for an appropriate response. “Oh Steven I’d love to…” He smiled prematurely, “…unfortunately I can’t.” His face fell immediately and she felt awful letting him down like this. “I’m sorry. I really do have a schedule to keep. Perhaps another time.” She added, but didn’t like giving him false hope.

Steven mentally kicked himself. Why hadn’t he taken up the courage to ask her five years earlier when he had really started to feel terribly attracted to her. He felt so stupid for leaving it so long and knew he had lost the chance. She must have someone else – what was he thinking? Of course she had someone else; a beautiful, brilliant woman like her. “Yes of course. I’m sorry. Another time. Of course. You need to get on. What was I thinking?” He stammered and then entered the room. Sharra followed him, looking down at her feet, torturing herself inwardly for having to let him go. She really was attracted to him too. She could only hope and pray that her being in his life hadn’t disrupted his own natural timeline and future with a wife. That would be yet another change to this fragile timeline that was already experiencing so many quantum disturbances.

As the two doctors entered Kelly’s room, her parents stood, holding hands to emotionally as well as physically support each other. Steven pulled himself together and stepped forward to address the couple. “Mr and Mrs Kemp. Doctor Dawn has informed you of our next proposed course of treatment for Kelly?” They nodded and he continued. “I am so sorry that she hasn’t come out of her comatose state at this stage, but I have had the pleasure of working with doctor Dawn for many years and her coma hospital is most definitely the place for Kelly right now. The hospital has an excellent record for bringing comatose patients back to consciousness in the least amount of time and her programme for the rehabilitation of those patients really can’t be faulted. It is a world renowned clinic and you are very lucky to have her at your disposal, right on your doorstep so to speak. I know it is a hard decision to make and that not being able to see your daughter as often as you would like is a difficult thing for the family, but I must reinforce the fact that I personally see this as our best option at this point in time.”

He nodded and stepped forward to shake their hands as they too nodded that they understood the proposal of this next step in their daughter’s treatment. He turned to leave the room after shaking their hands. “I shall leave you in Doctor Dawn’s capable hands now.” He concluded.

“Thank you Doctor Price for all your efforts.” Angela said tearfully as he left. She turned to Sharra and whispered, “I know you will do all you can for our daughter Doctor. We will leave her to you now. Please, if there is any change – you will let us know immediately won’t you?” Sharra tried not to show her emotions as the empathy for what this woman was going through really hit her. She thought back to the time she had been harvested from her own family and tried to imagine what it would be like as her mother, to have this beautiful girl ripped from her life so tragically. Of course she couldn’t, not being a mother herself. She was thankful that this was the case and that she could be fairly unemotional and impartial about the whole situation. She reassured Angela that she would treat Kelly as her own daughter and of course that they would be kept up to date with her progress in every minute detail.

With the deal done and with the paperwork signed, Kelly’s parents left the hospital and their daughter in a somewhat subdued mood. Neither spoke to the other as they drove quietly and sombrely home. The silent tears continued to fall down Angela’s cheeks as she sat gazing blankly out of the passenger window at a world she didn’t see. Ron turned to see his wife so obviously in shock and when the car stopped at a set of traffic lights, put a calm, quiet hand of reassurance on hers. He had no need to try and give her any more words of comfort. This simple act said it all and she wiped her eyes and smiled mutely back at him. They had each other and that would have to be enough for now.

Spiritual Warfare and the Doors between Darkness and Light

My latest Youtube video on Spiritual Warfare

To watch the video click the link above.  Don’t forget to like the video on youtube, subscribe to my channel and share with your friends.  Thanks guys.  Below is the written version of the content of the video – there’s a little more in the video due to some  ad-libbing… 

What is spiritual warfare in today’s world? What does it look like? Is there even such a thing?

Spiritual warfare is real! The battle is real! I believe that it is for the most part an unseen battle, but it is a real war that is continually going on in the spiritual realms between darkness and light.

I hear you asking, but what is this battle between darkness and light? Spiritually, what does that look like? Well, I believe now, today, more people are seeing that battle playing out in the world. It can seem like we are living in very dark times – right now!

In the bible there is a very colourful description of a spiritual battle…

“Then war broke out in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down – that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.

Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:

“Now have come the salvation and the power and the Kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Messiah. For the accuser of our brothers and sisters, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. Therefore rejoice, you heavens and you who dwell in them! But woe to the earth and the sea, because the devil has gone down to you! He is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short.”

(Revelation 12:7-12)

So the bible talks about the devil and his angels who “lead the whole world astray.” This devil, the serpent in the bible is featured from Genesis through to Revelation…this is the enemy in this spiritual war we fight daily…

…But in our reality, in the now, in our day to day, what does that look like? Well, to me the enemy that hides in the darkness uses very specific weapons in this spiritual war and these are hinged on lies and fear – negative and oppressive thoughts and feelings like depression and anxiety, stress, sickness, doubt, feelings of inferiority, discouragement, loneliness… and also things like pride and greed…

But I think the biggest weapons the enemy uses are guilt and shame.

What does guilt and shame look like and why is it a weapon the enemy uses? I was contemplating this the other day, and I was thinking that if you feel you have to hide something from your loved ones – parents, partner, husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, school, work, friends – yourself…

…if you are trying to hide anything, then I wonder if maybe there is something unhealthy going on in your spiritual life – something that is not good for you in mind, body or soul! If you have to hide it, think to yourself – why? What is it that leads you to feel guilty or ashamed of that thing? I am speaking to myself here as well, as I express to understand through the Spirit.

If you are walking with God, why would you need to hide anything?

I am reminded of the story of the Fall in Genesis 3, when Adam and Eve tried to hide from God in the garden because they had eaten the forbidden fruit and were suddenly ashamed of their nakedness. This was because they were now aware of the difference between goodness and evil – sin had entered the perfect paradise that God had made for them.

God asked them – “Who told you that you were naked?”

The serpent had deceived them, but because God had given them free-will, they had the power to choose to do what they had known was forbidden for their own good, and so they chose to listen to the serpent instead of God, who had created them and knew what was best for them. They knew it was wrong, but chose to do it anyway and it was that awareness, that feeling of guilt that the serpent had awoken. I think this was a spiritual awakening, this awareness between good and evil, darkness and light, truth and deception.

Much like when we are teenagers, I thought, when we know what our parents tell us not to do because it will harm us, but we push the boundaries, thinking we will choose to do things our own way because, why not? And sometimes these things can be the start of a slippery slope into dangerous sin that leads to spiritual darkness, like experimenting with smoking for example – what harm can it do? After all everyone does it, right? And then moving on to weed, thinking perhaps, what harm can it do? It’s just a bit of weed? And then another jump and it’s harder drugs! And the boundaries get pushed farther and farther each time…with harmless looking sin that leads to darker and darker, harder to get out of sin…

The spiritual battle is fought in the mind, in the heart and in the spirit; in darkness and in secret, behind closed doors – physical doors and spiritual doors! There are mention of doors in the bible. Jesus himself uses this image of the door to reach us – “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and him with me.” (Revelation 3:20) He even refers to himself as a door or gate – “I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. They will come in and out, and find pasture.” (John 10:9)

He invites us to use these spiritual doors to him – “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8)

And yet God has reminded me that there are things meant to be kept hidden! The intimacy between Man and Wife for example in (1 Peter 3), an individual’s dreams (Psalm 37:3). There are even moments meant to be just between God and individuals – (Hebrews4:12),(1 John 2:27), (Jeremiah 29:11-14) says – “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” The bible talks numerous times about being hidden in or beneath God’s wings – (Psalm 91:4, Deuteronomy 32:11, Jeremiah 49:22) to name but a few. And even God has hidden things from humanity! In the book of Daniel it talks about God telling Daniel to roll up the words he was told until an appointed future time.

And the mind too has doors; and sometimes those doors are even closed to ourselves. Sometimes emotional trauma is so great that our minds create doors to keep such things safe behind, and these memories can be so traumatic that they cause great hurt, and sometimes those dreaded feelings of guilt and shame that can be so destructive…

“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” (Matthew 7:13-14) And those thoughts and feelings are particularly destructive, I think, when they are created through an act on someone who had no control in the situation; some abuse that has been inflicted on them by another (or sometimes themselves) – people can abuse themselves – but all of these things, these “battles” are, at the end of the day, fought in the mind and are spiritual battles between the darkness and light in our lives. And so sometimes doors can protect us from those destructive thoughts and those emotions coming through and doing damage – but God will never give you more than you can bear! It says in (1 Corinthians 10:13) But sometimes doors need to be opened or kicked in because they can keep you trapped behind them!

So, why do we feel the need to hide? We hide because we feel guilty and are ashamed. Those feelings are there to tell us there’s something we are hiding that maybe isn’t good for us, or perhaps are too intimate to share. And sometimes that’s OK, however, Satan, the devil, the serpent, that enemy who likes to ask us – “Did God really say?” He is a devious, scheming liar. He wants to turn you from God and the light, towards fear and darkness. He wants you to feel so ashamed and guilty that you cower away in the darkness and hide, alone, separated from God and God’s people…

…He is a liar and a thief and “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy;” (John 10:10) He wants to steal your joy, kill your peace and destroy your faith. But Jesus says, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” You see, the enemy will try and trap you with his lies. He wants you to doubt God’s word, but God wants to remind you of his promises, his truth and love…he says, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Romans 12:21)

He promises that, “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear, but when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13) He will give you the strength to open those doors or he will open those doors for you!

(1 John 3:8) says, “the reason the son of God appeared was to destroy the devil’s work.” He tells us that, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)

And of course God promises he will give us the strength and will protect us – “But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one.” (2 Thessalonians 3:3) Because God loves us and he wants us to have peace in him; “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) – “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9) “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us?” (Romans 8:31)

So how can we fight in this spiritual battle? In his word he tells us to “be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armour of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.” (Ephesians 6:10-11) He promises to give us the weapons to use in this battle. And these are spiritual weapons – “For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:3-5). “in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39) What are these spiritual weapons? God tells us in his word…

“Put on the full armour of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.” (Ephesians 6:11-17)

Finally God continually reminds us that this spiritual battle is not for us to battle alone. “This is what the Lord says to you: Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.” (2 Chronicles 20:15) “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” (James 4:7) “For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the Kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.” (Colossians 1:13-14). “On this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.” (Matthew 16:18)

So, I am encouraged and pass on this encouragement to you that through Christ we can conquer all the devil’s schemes in this spiritual battle – those negative thoughts, emotions, temptations, struggles and hardships that we go through daily. He will give you the weapons to fight with and the strength to endure. He will give you the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control, which is the fruit of his Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) and will fill you with his light that gives you freedom to walk in the darkness of the world – “I am the light of the world.” He says. “Whoever follows me will never walk in the darkness, but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12) – Because God wants you to live a good life, a life lived to the full (John 10:10) and you can’t do that when you are living under a cloud in spiritual darkness, hiding behind physical and spiritual doors. Let’s kick down those doors together and step into the light my friends…

God bless you all and if you are battling with the spiritual darkness today ask Jesus into your heart right now and let his light guide you into a brighter tomorrow.

The Oncoming fiery storm… a personal and prophetic dream

Just woke up after quite a distressing disaster dream, which isn’t surprising due to everything going on in my life, always; I have had my share of disaster dreams over the years.

In this one, I was a young married woman, pregnant and visiting New York with my husband. We were on a pleasure cruise on the Hudson River. A few times in the dream and each time, there would be like a fiery cloud come rushing up the river behind us ready to consume us and the boat, and we would be scrabbling to find a barrier between it and us – very scary!

I kept asking people where Battery Park was because I needed to get there for some reason. We also went in some kind of petting Zoo attraction and I was appalled at the state of the bathroom, and I told the manager as he was coming in with a cleaner to sort it and he agreed with me.

I was also continually asking my husband ( a rather handsome young man if I remember correctly lol) if we were ok for money. He wouldn’t let me know how much he had for the trip and I told him how stressful that was for me – I didn’t know whether he had ten dollars or a thousand, and how could I cope and enjoy the trip under that much stress. But I had to just trust him to keep me safe and to provide for me – sounds like a trusting in Jesus thing to me!

And as for battery park – well obviously I am very low in energy as I am not well. But I just have to keep going. Can’t do it under my own steam – I will just be consumed by the fiery cloud so I have to trust God and lean on his strength. Anyway thought I would share that because it’s a good lesson for everyone. Have a good day folks and don’t be consumed by the fiery oncoming storm! Put your trust in the one who is in control.

There is a lot more to the interpretation of this dream and when I have time I will dig a little deeper.