symbolism

All posts tagged symbolism

My Research into Symbolism and a Personal Epiphany on Divine Symbology

Published March 29, 2015 by Laura Crean Author

symbolism and me

It’s been brought to my attention that the symbol of the pentacle could also be the symbol of the goddess Venus.  I’m not sure but it just proves my point that different symbols mean different things to different people at different times.   Symbols also seem to evolve over time.  I may well add to this post as I discover more, when I have time.  I thought I would add this following picture to illustrate both of these points.

I can see this post just growing and growing as I add more info relating to symbolism.  I just found this and thought it was quite incredible so I am adding it here.  Crop circles (another fascination of mine) may also make an appearance later on.  I will not stop my investigations that appear as if they are usually fueled by coincidence and chance – I don’t want to miss anything that could be a divine message.

Here is why crop circles and symbolism fascinate me

Update – 30/03/2015

my take on divine symbology

 

My take on Divine Symbology encompasses science and mathematics and perhaps when we look at the divine nature of God through the eyes of infinity through these symbols we may come to an understanding of other parts of reality such as time and space and alternate dimensions.

OK Next leap…

I think I can hear the angels singing

And at the centre of it all I can still see the cross, the heart of the whole, the om, heart chakra, love energy that leads back to Jesus – so Love is the centre of everything!

31/03/2015

LOL Look what I just found:

In response to this thread on another site, someone just posted simply “Fairy tales”.  This is my response to that – What are Fairy Tales? They are humanity making sense of the world through the narrative structure of stories – language – that most symbolic structure of all in humanity that helps us to transmit ideas – ideas that come from our imagination – what is imagination but the creative thought process that brings into creation that what once did not exist – WE create our reality and imagination is the most powerful tool humanity has.  Might I just add to that that it is said that God has given us ‘Free Will’ – what is free will?  To me it is the gift of imagination.

Update – my dream of last night 30th March 2015

https://lauracrean.wordpress.com/2015/03/31/symbolism-gods-divine-language-my-dream-of-last-night-30th-march-2015/

OK so now I have established that all this symbolism points to God and God reaching out to us in love through Jesus Christ, who is the bridge, that point at which dimensions of time, space and the reality we find ourselves existing in interact.  Jesus (everything that he represents which is basically LOVE – of God and God’s creation – us – loving ourselves and each other) is literally the Rainbow Bridge, the tunnel of light, the concept of the wormhole – he is the way, the truth, the life – the only way – to come to God, to live free, to live eternally, to escape sin and Satan.  Who is Satan? Satan is the power that is dominating and enslaving humanity.  The power behind everything that keeps humanity blind and stumbling around in chains of servitude – separated from each other and separated from the truth – and that power is a dark, hidden, deceitful entity that controls humanity through money, deception and fear – controlling us even as we don’t realize we are being controlled, like puppets, dancing to every step we are taught.  We are born into an illusion that is fed through the media and through the very societal systems that we live in.  How can we jump onto that bridge and cross over to freedom?  By waking ourselves up to the truth, and the truth is we have to learn how to perceive reality as it truly is, we have to stop looking at the world through the rose tinted glasses of Satan’s illusion and focus in to a new reality, the reality that we can be free if we break the chains that bind us.  But we cannot do that in the reality we are currently living in.  We cannot be free whilst living in this reality and we need to come together and effect the change we want BEFORE Satan fully forms his NEW WORLD ORDER because then I fear it will be too late!  The only way is to see that we are all connected from the very moment of creation.  Every cell, every fiber of our being is linked to each other, to the Earth, to the cosmos and to God and that we are in fact from one original source.  We are one body, one entity and by giving in to sin and to Satan it is only ourselves, that one body that we are hurting, killing actually.  I don’t want to die I want to live and live in freedom – don’t you?  So we need to become consciously awake as ONE consciousness not as individuals separately trying to stumble around and make a difference, we need to think together, act together and Love together.  By acting and thinking as one entity, Satan will have nobody left to control. This is how that one sacrifice can make the difference – through Jesus we become that ONE body of love that CAN create a new reality.

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Dreaming in Purple – A Daydreamer’s Guide to the Messages and Symbolism of Dreams.

Published February 25, 2014 by Laura Crean Author
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picture courtesy of Gale Titus at publicdomainpictures.net

 

Hello everyone.  I am planning to write a book about dreams and would love to include some of your dreams.  And between us I hope we can come to understand the images and symbols in the dreams and therefore the hidden messages within them. I am open to others’ views and interpretations also, as different cultures and disciplines use different ways to interpret and understand dreams. If you post your dreams here please be aware they will be open for public dissection in this blog – if you want a private interpretation I would be happy to give you my personal view via email at laura.crean@yahoo.co.uk – please put ‘Dreams’ in the title.

 

If there is one thing I can say about humanity that sets us apart from all other life on this planet (that we know about), it is our unquenchable thirst for knowledge.  Perhaps even before we had any form of a complicated spoken language that would be recognised by modern humans, our early ancestors would have been searching for meaning in their lives.  Language as we understand it may not have been the beginnings of this.  Because after all, what is language but a series of spoken symbols that represent the ‘things’ around us in our lives.

I believe that dreams are a language all of their own.  they take the ‘things’ and the ‘happenings’ of our daily life and weave them into a complex ‘story’ that our subconscious mind uses to tell us things about ourselves.  What it is – this story – this dream imagery is still a subject for debate in our modern, scientific, computer dominated world.  Are these dream images just our own subconscious using the symbols humanity has learnt through language in a random firing of the brain’s neurons while we sleep – just a consequence of the knowledge language has given us?  Or maybe there are other elements to our dreams that we still do not fully understand today.

People have always been fascinated with dreams and the way dream images appear to tell some sort of a story.  However, understanding the stories being told, why we are having them and the mechanism behind them is still something people are trying to discover.  There are almost as many different explanations for the reason we dream as the types of dreams people have.

The symbolism of language and therefore dreams is something that has always fascinated me, and I have found myself wondering if we were dreaming ‘before’ we could speak.  Were primitive humans using cave art to represent their primitive worlds?  In other words, were they just drawing what they could see in nature and the world around them or were they also drawing their dreams? And if they were drawing their dreams, were they already speaking and communicating with each other or did that happen as a consequence of trying to communicate to others what they were dreaming?  So basically I wonder what came first – language or dreams?  Or did it all just happen together?  Now I’m not a scholar.  I don’t have any degrees, so I may sound like a complete rambling nut job – but – by exploring dreams in my own way with the help of you, I hope to at least feed some of my hunger on the subject of dreams and dream imagery.

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Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

 

Dream Blog – Unlimited Potential – Dream interpretation

Published December 30, 2013 by Laura Crean Author

This is a follow up to my dream posting of December 20th

https://lauracrean.wordpress.com/2013/12/20/dream-blog-unlimited-potential/

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There is so much symbolism in these few dreams that I wasn’t sure where to start, so I thought the best thing to do was to break the dreams down and list all the symbols I could see, then try and find the linking themes.  It appeared there were in fact 4 separate dreams here not 3 so I have listed the symbols under 4 dream headings below.

 

Dream 1 – The Supermarket Dream

 

  • Supermarket/hypermarket – shopping for something needed – new ideas? Attitudes?  (large building) – my own inner resources – huge potential to tap my inner wealth of talents and abilities.
  • Windows/Glass (lots of it) – window to the other side??? – dreams, consciousness, expanded vision, perception, interdimensional awareness – window between realities of the worlds of awake/asleep and everything in-between.
  • DIY/Home Improvements – self-explanatory (I need lots of work, I’m falling apart LOL) – need to repair those parts of myself that are wearing away due to lack of use – like Doctor Who (I need to rejenerate and become a new person LOL) – I need to make use of the New Year to work on my personal development.
  • My daughters – feminine aspects of myself? Passive ideas? Need to be more assertive? Relationships with or traits of my daughters? Alice (Adventurous) Shannon (Creative)
  • Bathrooms/lots of baths – purifying and letting go – cleansing negative and old ideas and difficult times – time to relax and self-indulge (rejenerate again LOL)
  • Expensive materials – marble/gold etc. – basically treasure! – a wealth of talents, abilities, creative powers within not yet realised – gold, inner light, god-force (creativity and love), wealth of happiness and positives abundant in life, gifts – mixed with the bath (a good positive way to look at being cleansed and using those gifts and positives in the future)
  • Exotic fountain type taps/mermaid – water symbolism (emotions?) – fountain of youth?  i.e. rejeneration again – new life – spiritual uplifting, healing, positive powers of creativeness.  Mermaid?  Part fish?  Unconscious thoughts that aren’t quite surfacing – need meditation to bring understanding or spiritual truths.  Emotions partly under water – people in therapy often dream of mermaids as they get closer to understanding issues about themselves.
  • Light bulb – ideas? Light – truth, understanding, spiritual awareness, imagination.  The danger of the water (my emotions) blowing up and putting out the light!!??… 
  • Dangerous situation/avoiding being blown up being out of control or not using ideas and gifts.
  • Wanting to punish the children/smacking/anger – loss of control?  Feeling out of control?  Punishing myself?  Feeling vulnerable?
  • Bedrooms/bed inside the drawer of another bed – bridge between the conscious and unconscious, life experiences – making my bed means willingness to create a new life for myself – drawers are hidden resources so the bed within the drawer of another bed could be the possibilities of multi-layered life experiences for me – I am hiding my life experiences away I need to bring them out of the drawer and enjoy them!!  Yeah!  This is true – I need to get out more and experience life.
  • 2 lamps/ 2 beds – shining light on a situation – my life – (two) – balance – need to find balance in my life and deal with the issues!
  • Handsome Italian man/feeling insulted by his (childcare) comments – apologising to him – making the bed – (need to make my bed???  Relationship with ex – divorce?) – maybe a handsome Italian stranger is going to come into my life?! LOL That would be nice!  Maybe I focus too much on the children and need to give thought to my own relationship building.  This is a foreign thing to me – I find it hard to build relationships and relate to others in daily life.  Making the bed with an Italian man could just mean I need to meet new people that I feel attracted to, not necessarily sexually attracted but just people that I am drawn to maybe?!

 

Dream 2 – The White House Dream

 

  • White House (large building again) – same symbolism as large supermarket, many rooms – myself and many aspects of myself.  ‘The White House’ – huge potential to have power over myself must not get rundown, need to build myself up AND work on my relationships with my sisters. (see below)
  • Relationships – sister and her ex-husband – relationship building with my sister – yes well that’s true I do need to build new relationships with both my sisters for different reasons.  Ex part could be because I have just started to see my eldest sister after many years.
  • Rundown house (DIY symbol again) – cheap house with potential needing lots of work – musn’t cheapen myself I have huge potential and must (Do it myself) LOL
  • Large/white/clean/lots of glass windows (again) – see glass above but also living in a house of glass could also mean anxieties of being seen i.e. vulnerable to attack from outside but also transparent – I suppose I am pretty transparent to others!!  Don’t hide much of myself BUT I do hide physically away –  The windows are large looking out into countryside, it felt comfortable, relaxing, like a heavenly landscape.  I think it means that my dream life and waking day to day life are connected.  I have a vast inner landscape that I (live in.) but need to get out in the real world too.  Spiritually aware!
  • Furniture – beliefs, ideas, attitudes, self-expression.  New furniture, white (spiritual ideas?)  – new ideas, beliefs, attitudes etc.  Not much furniture but…
  • Lots of toys (play? Innocence? Vulnerability?) – also lots of ideas to play with – too many LOL…
  • DE cluttering/organising/boxes of organised toys – need to sort my life out??! LOL lots of ideas to play with need to organise my thoughts??  Use my childcare knowledge/children’s stories???
  • Shed/out-house of toys – storage of old ideas and beliefs – possibly to be used in the future – storing or hording means standing still, not going anywhere – I need to look at what beliefs and attitudes in my life need re-evaluating and cleaning out – need to grow up a bit and take charge of my life!?…
  • Mostly toys in childrens’ bedrooms – unconscious cluttering of thoughts – need to meditate and de-clutter my mind of (anxieties and fears that are leaving me vulnerable and emotional and stunting my growth)
  • Lovely large open rooms with lots of windows – positive open attitude to my new life and potential for freedom in my life with a positive spiritual outlook.
  • Public library (seem to remember a kids’ library in there too) – work on kids’ books??? (inside house but separate) – lots of knowledge (everything you could want to know – a bit like the internet??!) – probably getting lost with my thoughts and the internet LOL but lots of potential there to use the knowledge.  Ability to learn and study for development.  Curiosity and searching/questioning/research (yes I do lots of that) – Also akin to akashik records – inner knowledge to be tapped.
  • Sister giving birth (in the shower- bathrooms and water like the fountain in the supermarket again) – birth – new life, new direction – rag doll – need for nurturing (I need a cuddle L), emotional healing…
  • Rag doll baby (another toy – childcare imagery again??) Relationship with my kids – more cuddles.
  • Feelings of disgust at birth of ragdoll? –  Don’t love myself!?
  • Bath/shower (bath and bathroom image again) – shower represents clean running water that is constantly being renewed – new life again, cleansing, mixed with the new life of the birthing symbol

 

Dream 3 – Plane Crash Dream

 

  • House in a cul-de-sac (nice comfortable neighbourhood) – houses well cared for (expensive looking – like expensive materials in supermarket dream?)
  • Field/countryside – growth, creativity, relaxation – getting back in tune with nature?! – getting out again
  • Plane/car (vehicle for self-expression and daily interactions through life)…
  • Crashing (out of control) – crashed (disaster) – not being in control of my own vehicle through life – not grounded
  • Pilot (higher self – guidance – God – guiding my journey through life – plane is a spiritual vehicle, linked to daily life as half car) giving me…
  •  business card / leaflet…
  • Flowers/florist (reference to my sister again as she was a florist with her own business) – a message to get on with the business of living – to get out into the world and get in touch with nature and people – for growth – need to plant a garden (flowers are the people in my garden)
  • Glass vase and glass roses (glass again) and (flowers) – the glass vase is a means for growth to display my inner beauty – the rose is a spiritual gift of love – a message from the spirit, the unconscious, God??!!  Gifts are to be shared – ❤ especially this one ❤
  • Exposed bedrooms after crash (bedrooms again) – exposed – open – not hiding who I am, especially my relationship with dreams, the unconscious and spiritual realms – letting others see me for who I am
  • Feelings of relief and guilt – relief that I can be who I am, having the freedom to express myself but guilt at this self-indulgence maybe?!
  • My house not damaged but rundown (my life??)

 

Dream 4 – Nursery Garden

 

  • Cute little black baby boy called ‘Alex’ (like the opposite of my youngest daughter ‘Alice’??) – that vulnerable hidden part of myself again that needs nurturing – male  aspects need to grow, need to be strong and assertive in my daily life, think rationally and practically about things
  • Nursery (big childcare reference again) – nurturing again, transitions and new growth same symbol as the garden as nursery can be a garden symbol too…
  • Garden – fruits of my labor, growing and learning, also need for growth and nurturing again and getting out – gardens need watering and tending so I need to keep on top of my health and well-being
  • Brick wall and niche containing fruit
  • Fruit (different varieties of berries and apples)– more than enough for everyone…
  • Baby enjoying the juicy fruit…
  • My happiness for my child/contentment – also fruits of my labor and fruits of the spirit – need to share the fruit around (there is more than enough for everyone)
  • Exploration/freedom/learning/self-expression/innocence (self-explanatory)
  • Ex-husband turns up in car to pick us up – relationship??  Who am I letting drive my vehicle in life – musn’t give away my power over my own journey!!
  • Car/bus (vehicle again) – not in control of my own vehicle again but huge potential of bus…
  • Nursery Nurses and conversation about not getting cars back – (my own concern about not getting control of my life back – childcare issue again (my work as a Nursery Nurse in the past??) – working with children or my relationship with my children or both??!! Also taking care of myself and getting my health under control
  • Husband in control??!  Leaving me…
  • Feelings of abandonment on the street corner (to fend for myself??) (loss of control in my life again)…
  • Lost baby – same type of symbol again – lost/abandoned/vulnerable/not being taken care of
  • Husband’s colleague with message…
  • (Boss) lost the plot/talking rubbish about consciousness/dimensions and my acknowledgement that I’m OK with that subject matter – (others’ perceptions of me?? But I am my own boss – so self-critical thoughts) coming to terms with my own belief systems and ideas
  • Restaurant (large building again) – need lots of sustenance and nurturing and fellowship – there was no food in the restaurant only the medical stuff so I need to take care of my health
  • Males (men and boys)… same symbolism as the baby boy – masculine traits in me need building up, also the intimidation I feel at being surrounded by authority, suits, the boss etc.
  • Green suits all the same – the male aspects above are clothed in green so I need to concentrate on the growth of those aspects in me – being strong, assertive, practical, having authority over myself and not being intimidated by those traits in others – surround myself in my own creativity
  • Lost child again (in public)?? medical room, asthma pumps and hiding in a corner…  (my agrophobia, depression and anxieties?)…
  • Husband hiding medical stuff – (trying to ignore my health issues??)
  • Feelings of grief and guilt (again)
  • Finding child – soaking wet – (water and emotions and vulnerability again)…
  • Questioning thoughts about my husband abandoning my son –  (abandonment issues again – oh dear!)…
  • Comforting my baby (self-soothing – taking care of myself, knowing I am feeling vulnerable, nobody to take care of me except myself – need to get on with it!!)
  • Boss letting staff go and husband tearing up cheque – I need to take charge of my own life – tearing up the cheque is a symbol of feeling like I am not being appreciated – not getting enough rewards for my own efforts from others 

So there you are; as you can see from the repetative symbolism in these dreams, if you record your dreams over several nights or weeks and then look at the repeating symbols you will soon see a pattern emerging.  These repeating symbols can help you focus on any problems that arise – well hopefully!  At the very least you will become more aware of problem areas in your life or hopefully if things are going well – you will see lots of repeating positive symbolism.  I have a mixture of both at the moment.  

You may have found that you recognise some of the dream symbols or imagery in my dreams from your own dreams.  Perhaps you will be able to make a dream dictionary of the symbols that occur in your dreams and use them to help you become more aware of how these symbols work for you in your own subconscious world.  Like any symbolism though, different symbols and dream images can mean different things to different people, so you need to learn your own dream language and how it relates to you – dreams are relative to the person dreaming them but seeing how others dream may help you decode your own symbols.  I have also found that it can be very enlightening when others give their interpretation of your dreams, as they may see your life from a different perspective again.

Dream Blog – Unlimited Potential

Published December 20, 2013 by Laura Crean Author

I have had 3 dreams in 3 nights which I seem to remember pretty well and they have impressed upon me the need to reflect on what my subconscious and the Realm of Dreams are trying to tell me.  I will record the  dreams in as much detail as possible and then later when I have time I will reflect on any interpretations I can give them.

The first dream, the dream of Tuesday night took place in an immense supermarket which my brain was telling me was Asda, but it was vast inside.  It was also really light, made of lots and lots of glass.  As I began to walk around with my children I realised there were far more shopping options in this store than the usual mundane food and clothes of my local Asda.  In this store we moved through various D.I.Y home imorovement areas which included showrooms for the various rooms you would find in your average house – bathrooms and bedrooms etc.  The first thing I remember clearly was walking through the bathroom area.  There were rows of really extravagant baths, made of gold or marble, basically expensive materials.  The taps were like ornaments, I remember one of the taps was a mermaid and the water was flowing out of the taps like fountains and the water was hitting the light hanging over the bath.  I was concerned that this was going to cause a fire and my 9 year old daughter proceeded to climb up onto the bath with the intension of unscrewing the lightbulb.  I shouted for her to get down and pulled her down.  I wanted to smack her and tried but my arm wouldn’t strike her (this is bizarre because I have never smacked my children, I barely raise my voice) but in the dream I really wanted to smack her but my arm wouldn’t follow through.  Then my 15 year old started to do the same thing and I pulled her down and tried to smack her too but again my arm wouldn’t let me.  I remember feeling a great rage like i had to smack her but my arm wouldn’t allow me to.  I gave up and we continued walking around the shop.

Ideal Home Show 2012

Then I remember we walked through the bedroom department and we were looking at this big double bed when I suddenly looked round and couldn’t see my youngest daughter.  Then I saw movement from a drawer under the bed so I pulled the drawer out and underneith the bed was a whole bedroom set out – a double bed with 2 bedside lamps on bedside cabinets.  My daughter was playing under there.

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I told her off and told her to come out and started apologising to the sales assistant who i noticed was this really young, sexy Italian man.  He said it was OK and said something wierd about me being a child carer.  I felt insulted and told him they were my children as I helped him to re-make the bed.

I don’t remember much more of the dream except that as we continued to walk through the store it seemed like we were outside but I knew we were still inside, it may have been because of all the glass.  At the edge of the store there was a huge rollercoaster that was a dragon but I don’t remember any more than that.

The second dream, the one fromWednesday night was set in a huge white house that was a complete mess, it was run down and full of rubble and rubbish, with walls missing in some places.  The house belonged to my sister, she owned it with her ex husband, they seemed to be back together in the dream.  I was there to help her do it up.  We seemed to do this almost instantly in the dream.  Soon it was this beautiful, beautiful house – all painted white with great big rooms all white and clean with lots of huge glass windows looking out into a big driveway and gardens and the house had hardly any furniture.   It seemed like a small palace to me and from the outside it looked like a miniature version of The White House.  I asked her how she could afford such a big house and she said it was cheap because it had been falling apart and needed lots of work.

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As I looked around the house I remember thinking how lovely it was and how big the rooms were.

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Then as I began exploring all the rooms I noticed that most of the bedrooms were crammed full of old children’s toys.

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I immediately knew that I wanted to sort it all out for her and started planning in my head that I would take lots of boxes into the rooms and sort out all the toys into the boxes.

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I was very excited to do this and thought the rooms would look beautiful once all the toys were cleared out.  I explained to her which rooms I thought would be better for her children. Oh yes she was pregnant in the dream.

At one point while I was exploring the house I seemed to wander into a public library but it was a part of the house somehow.  The library was filled with glass partitioning walls and great staircases.  I can’t remember what happened while I was in the library but I think it had everything you could want to know in it.  when I was back in the house I was exploring and I came across my sister in a shower – she was giving birth and I was appalled and disgusted when she gave birth to a rag doll.  I can’t remember anything else about it other than this overwhelming feeling of disgust.  Then I remember also being disgusted with all the amniotic fluids all over my hands and I put my sister in the bath and had a shower myself.  the last thing i remember is sorting out the rooms with toys in them and something about an old out house or shed or something that also had old toys in in that needed sorting out.

There was a third part to the dream but it seems to have gone into another dream actually.  I was in my own house now but it wasn’t the house i live in, in reality, it was the end house in a lovely little countryside cul de sac and my house was next to a big green field and beyond that was the countryside.  All the houses in the street were beautiful houses, really well cared for and expensive looking but an ordinary street at the same time.  I was standing in my front garden and I noticed a small plane coming towards me.  I thought it was going to crash at first but it just came to land in the field and as it landed i could see that it was half car and half plane so it landed and skidded to a stop as a car.  The man jumped out and ran towards me saying he had something for Zoe, who I knew to be my daughter’s friend from school (very odd) it appeared she lived across the street from us.  It was a business card and leaflet of some kind, something to do with flowers or a florist!?!  Then he flew off again.

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I took the stuff over to the house she lived in and gave it to her Mother.  Then I seemed to jump to another point in the dream where I was walking along a row of quaint shops in a beautiful little cobble stone rural village and I went into a shop to talk to this girl’s mother again.  It was some sort of gift shop and she was doing a display on a shelf with these beautiful glass objects, they were like vases with candles in them and coloured glass flowers molded to the front of the clear glass.

Then I was back in the street again.  I noticed the plane/car thing was coming towards me again but this time it crashed into the houses on my side of the street.  I screamed and was thinking ‘No not my house’ but luckily for me it seemed to only clip the front of my house taking out a shed but comletely went through whole portions of the other houses leaving bedrooms exposed.  I remember feeling overwhwelmed with relief that my house wasnt too damaged but guilty that all the other houses were really badly damaged.  Then I looked at my house and realised how poor and rundown it looked compared to all the other houses in the street but it didn’t matter because mine wasn’t damaged and theirs was.  That’s all I remember.

Last night’s dream was very bizarre.  I had a baby with my ex-husband (we were still together in my dream which seems to happen quite a lot in my dreams – I truly have no desire to be reconciled with him and he has a new family now anyway) but in the dream I was at a nursery with my baby, now this baby was a black baby boy called Alex – we are both white, so I am not sure of the significance of this yet, plus my daughter’s name is Alice which sounds similar, so again not sure of the significance of this yet.  Anyway I was in the nursery garden with my baby who was a toddler and he was wandering around in the garden and I was just sort of watching him exploring, letting him experience his environment.

Garden-Rooms

At the back of the garden there was a little niche in a brick wall and inside the niche were growing different fruits.  There were grapes and I think strawberries and blackberries and round behind the wall, apples and in the niche on the other side were apples that were picked and just sort of lined up in there ready to be picked up and eaten.  One of the Nursery Nurses was standing by the niche eating an apple and she offered me one and I asked her why there were so many apples and why some of them were different varieties.  She said that children often bring apples in their lunch and don’t eat them so they put them here for anyone to help themselves.

I noticed my son start to examine the fruits on the other side of the wall so I went back to him and encouraged him to pick them and try them.  He went for a grape and picked it.  It was a huge grape and looked really juicy and he seemed to enjoy it.  I felt really happy that he was able to experience the world in this free environment.

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Then my husband came to pick us up.  He pulled up in his car but for some reason the next thing that I remember is us sitting on a bus.  I asked him why we were sitting on the bus and I overheard one of the Nursery Nurses who was also on the bus talking to another Nursery Nurse about their concern at leaving their cars at the nursery in case they couldn’t get back in to get them and I shared my concern with him.  He told me not to worry and he would go back and get the car later.  I asked him where we were going and he said a company meal.

Then he seemed to leave me standing on the path a little bit away from the restaurant, or club or whatever the building was and said he was going back to get the car now.  I felt completely abandoned and really vulnerable standing on the street corner on my own (I don’t know where the baby was).  As I was standing there waiting it was getting dark, a work colleague of my husband’s came up to me and said something like, you don’t want to go in there Laura the boss has lost the plot, he’s talking rubbish these days and keeps going on about consciousness and other dimensions.  So I say that that’s OK and that I like conversations about those sorts of things and I head towards the building.

I go into the restaurant and all the men are wearing the same suit, I can’t remember the colour, possibly a lime green, but they were all wearing exactly the same suit, even the boy children of the employees and I thought this was odd and wondered why my husband wasn’t wearing the same suit but then he walked in the door wearing the same suit with a little black boy in the same suit and I said something like ‘aww cute but what’s with the suit?’ and I continued in thinking my husband and son were following me.  He looked at me and asked ‘where’s Alex?’ and I looked at the little boy as he ran past and thought ‘that’s not my son!’ and felt overwhelmed with grief and guilt that I didn’t recognise my own son and couldn’t remember what he looked like.  We both panicked and were looking all around for him calling his name and then I opened the door and he was standing in the foyer crying and dripping wet.  I remember thinking ‘how could his Father just leave him out here, knowing that he had been in the car with him and I picked him up and started cuddling and comforting him.  For the rest of the dream he was a baby!

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We walked into the restaurant and my husband led me off to a corner table where he thought nobody would see us.  I don’t remember too much more except at one point I went off to what looked like a school medical room and on the bed was lots of medical equipment that my family seemed to need and my husband told me to leave it all there while we were in the restaurant so nobody would see it.  It looked like some of my eldest daughter’s old asthma medication, the large plastic breathing device she used to have when she was small to help her take her inhalers and her puffer for recording the strength of her breathing and various other pieces of medical looking equipment.

The last thing I remember was that the boss was letting people in the company go and he was presenting them with cheques.  My husband went up and received a cheque for something like 2 or 3 or possibly 4 thousand pounds.  He was so disgusted he tore it up in front of everyone.  There was more to this dream involving water – a big river in the middle of a city and boats but I can’t remember anything else.

So there you are 3 days of quite a detailed dream blog.  I may have to think about these dreams for a while before I offer anything – I had a few ideas yesterday but didn’t find the time to write them down and I need to get it straight in my head first.  Maybe someone out there in WordPress world wants to add their own observations or interpretations.  It doesn’t have to be relevant to me – it could be an interpretation relative to society and social issues.  I usually see my dreams as reflecting my own mind and situation as well as what is going on in a wider social setting also as we are all deeply set in a wider social context – even more in these days on instant media.

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